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Oh I caught you shaking your head… I bet you are agreeing that you are currently running around like a chicken with your head cut off!
You are a super multi-tasker, can run from baseball to dance in a single bound, do everything for everyone because you are a people pleaser, love helping others, but you too have lost yourself in the shuffle and are tired and wore out, right?
Been there done that and have vowed to myself that as of this year being Super Woman is a thing of the past…. Now mind you, that does not mean that I am too OLD to be Super Woman – Oh NO…. What that means is, as I have aged and gotten wiser I have learned a couple things and these things I am going to share may actually keep you younger and add some years to your life – unlike the Super Woman routine which will take MANY years off your life….
I have been Super Woman as long as I can remember…. And yes I am a people pleaser and it has taken me a long time to learn how to say NO. No is not a bad thing – No means that you are able to say YES to the most important things and not everything that comes your way. No means that you are looking out for yourself because you too have limitations and you are finally aware of them. For more on this, I highly recommend reading Best Yes: Making Wise Decisions in the Midst of Endless Demands by Lysa TerKeurst. Also if you are looking for inspiration, guidance, humor and an educational on how to break such habits, I also highly recommend 52 Strategies for Life, Love and Work by Anne Grady. You can listen in to my Mountain Woman Radio Interview with Anne Grady as well.
It is not easy to say NO, oh how I know this and it isn’t always easy to break such habits. When my bad habits of being Super Woman and saying Yes to everything plain down right wore me out to the point of total exhaustion, it was time to take matters seriously and to heart. Being a people pleaser is not a bad thing at all and I feel I have come up with a way to be happy with my choices and still be good to me. I started putting things in order like so, first comes God, then ME, then my husband, then my son, then my job(s), family and then my friends. Now some of you may look at this list and think WOW how selfish is she that she puts herself ahead of everything, but God. Let me share my thoughts on this! If I personally am not well then how can I possibly be good to anyone else? I’ve put myself in that position so I can be good to myself which will allow me to be a better wife, mom and friend….
I was neglecting myself for so long that I became worthless to not only myself, but to everyone when my adrenals started to fail, my hormones went way out of wack because my adrenals were so bad, my liver needed detoxed because it was being taxed because everything else was taxed and SO ON….
The last three years have been very strenuous years of work work work and a little bit more work with maybe just enough sleep to keep me going, but not to pick me up and a todo list that would not quite. Homesteading, making, cooking and baking everything from scratch, milking goats, washing, cleaning, doing dishes, web designing, writing, videoing, contributing, homeschooling, educating others on our website, donating my time and website abilities to several places such as our church, etc, still trying to be a wife, mother, friend and totally leaving absolutely no time for me…
When the adrenals began to crash it was time to rethink life – I am constantly talking about living the Simple Life and WAIT A MINUTE *facepalm* I am not living the Simple Life anymore – I got lost somewhere between there and here…..
So, my goal today is to try to share with you what I have learned and how to avoid this nasty place that I landed… Poor health and unhappiness… Now remember I am the forever optimist so when I was in the unpleasant place, I was beating myself up for even slightly being unhappy when what I should have really been doing is forgiving myself and understanding that if I were to see a friend doing this to themselves I would extend to them compassion and tell them to stop and be good to themselves. I want you to stop right here and remember that when you start beating yourself up for ANYTHING that you pause and consider how you would react to your dear friend in the same situation… Showing ourselves compassion, understanding and forgiveness is SO important – we can sometimes be our worst enemies. It is ok if you don’t get everything completed on the todo list or if you forgot to pick up something on your grocery list. We are human and we forget to be kind to ourselves…..
Something else you need to remember, although we make wonderful Super Woman – our husband’s tend to get used to Super Woman and feel that we are capable of anything in a single bound so when you hit this place and are no longer able – it is best to let him know that you are turning in your Super Woman attire for your jeans and a t-shirt and it is time to retire. This is meant with no disrespect to any of you wonderful men out there – my husband doesn’t always know just how much I do in a day because I multi-task like nobody’s business, do little things all throughout the house in a single bound that go totally unnoticed by the male eye and go so fast that they miss me in passing so it is really important that you express to your husband that you have hit rock bottom and REALLY REALLY need a break. Better yet – don’t allow yourself to get to the point that I did… 🙂
I needed to get myself back on track and that HAD to start with my health. Now I was already taking Sage, Chamomile, Elderberry, Holy Basil, Nettle, Raspberry, Spearmint, Peppermint, Ashwagandha Root and Rehmannia Root teas to which I purchased from MountainRoseHerbs.com. I was taking Standard Process Herbs and doing everything in my power to be well, but it wasn’t working. The teas were helping, but I had my body, mind and even my spirit SO taxed that it would take God and one of his miracles… I was focusing heavily on drinking excess water each day, trying my darnedest to get 8 hours of sleep a night, to get outside for some exercise (yes that sounds so sad, but my girlfriend will visit and yell up to my window in the loft asking for Rapunzel – the reality is that I haven’t gotten to see daylight much this year due to my work load) and take at least 15 minutes to myself each day.
This was a wake up call for me because I have always pushed myself, but this time I was not bouncing back like I always did… I was hurting and struggling greatly.
God opened a BIG door for me to healing when everything fell into place after a year of researching and contemplating which oil company I felt would suit me best. My dear friend in Alaska dealt with me picking her brain often and wanting very passionately to get involved with Essential Oils and suddenly that door opened. I got involved Essential Oils and found the perfect oils for my family. I have used Essential Oils and herbs for a LONG LONG time…. Since I was 14 as a matter a fact and that was a VERY long time ago….
As much as I used essential oils, it only made sense to get them at a discount and also for me to become a Wellness Advocate so I was able to share my passion for natural health with other people.
Now, I need to share something with you. I have NEVER found any form of vitamins that worked well for me. It just never failed – I was always sick on them in some way. So when my friend suggested that I try the daily supplements pack, I bulked big time!! I did not want to invest the money in something that would just make me sick…. She kept on me and reminded me that ALL companies products have a 100% money back guarantee SO I tried them…
When I started taking the daily supplements I was completely awed that they did not make me sick! That was the 1st plus… This was such a blessing and to my surprise I started to feel better which was also a blessing. The daily supplements was exactly what my body needed to get back on track. I had more energy, I did not wake with headaches and nauseated, I was regular for the 1st time in my life (sorry TMI – but I know many of you can relate) and my body no longer hurt to the touch. This was a start and I was finally heading in the right direction. The supplements are formulated with potent levels of essential nutrients and powerful metabolic factors for optimal health, energy, and longevity, coupled with Essential Oils – they are a power pack of goodness! ♥
Diet plays a BIG roll in how we feel too, but thankfully I could rule that one out because we make, bake and cook everything from scratch and I have already eliminated starches and sugars from my diet a year ago. For those of you that eat processed foods and a lot of starches and sugars, you will be extremely surprised how much those things affect your body. Once I had removed those things from my diet I felt INCREDIBLE, but that was before I totally taxed my system. When I removed these foods from my diet – I was no longer tired or holding excessive amounts of fluid and my joints no longer hurt.
Sleep plays a much greater roll than most people realize it. We have been told all our lives that we need 8 hours of sleep a night and this is TRUE. Our bodies need that down time to rejuvenate and rest. I was NOT sleeping near enough – my days were not long enough and I was taking time away from my sleep to keep trying to get what was on my todo list completed. Again taxing my system over and over again. Once I started paying more attention to getting 8 hours of sleep a night I started to see some changes. This is SO important not just when we are older, but at any age. When we provide our body with what it requires we add years to our lives. The more we push our bodies the more we take away from our bodies. It is no different than a car running low on oil – nothing good can come of it.
Exercise is detrimental to our health as well. Exercise promotes good health, it eliminates stress and detoxes your system at the same time. I honestly LOVE to exercise, but there has not been time for me to do so. In all honesty, it has been a blessing for me to just have enough time to use the bathroom during the day, but that is changing.
I started to add varying oils to my day as well:
- Grounding Blend – Do you ever feel disconnected or anxious? Yeah – me too…. The Grounding Blend is a blend of spruce, Ho Wood, frankincense, and blue tansy with fractionated coconut oil to offer an enticing fragrance which promotes tranquility and a sense of balance and that it does. It is a great oil to start your day and also to end your day. I use this in a diffuser in my office and in an air purifier in our bedroom. LOVE IT!
- Focusing Blend – Do you have difficulty paying attention or at times staying focused? Yep again – me too… The Focusing Blend is also a proprietary blend of amyris, patchouli, frankincense, lime, ylang ylang, sandalwood, Roman chamomile essential oils and was carefully selected for their ability to enhance focus and support healthy thought processes. Hallelujah….
- Ylang Ylang – You ever need a pick me up? Oh YESSS I do… This oil greatly demonstrates the diversity of essential oils and how an oil can be good for one end of the spectrum and still be usable for something at the completely different side of the spectrum. God created such amazing oils and created our bodies in such an amazing way that it knows when it needs such an oil to pick me up or to calm me down… How amazing is that?!! If you didn’t guess – Ylang Ylang is an effective mood uplifting agent as well as having calming properties.
- Frankincense – This is my most used oil…. Referenced in the bible SO many times and perhaps the most precious of the ancient oils, frankincense is highly sought after for it’s many uses, including relaxation, immune support, and mood enhancement. Could you use a little bit of that yourself? I sure could – one of the biggest ways Frankincense helped me was with inflammation in my body.
- Lavender – I LOVE the smell of Lavender and have been using it in my soaps and candles from the start. Lavender has been cherished for its unmistakable aroma and its therapeutic properties for thousands of years. Lavender is widely used for its calming and relaxing qualities and that was exactly how I used it. This too is a daily part of my diffuser.
- Rosemary – Rosemary has been revered by healers for centuries for its digestive uses and for muscle aches and pains and it served it’s purpose well.
- Lemon – Who doesn’t like the smell of lemon? Lemon is a great cleansing oil not just for the body, but for our home. I use lemon in my water daily with a touch of my homemade stevia to help cleanse my system. Lemon is a powerful aromatic, topical, and internal cleanser that can be used to complement many other oils and in many dishes in the kitchen. Diffusing lemon in a room can cleanse the air and uplift mood. I also use it throughout my home in my homemade cleaning products.
I LOVE my diffuser. My diffuser has really aided me on this journey to finding peace and good health. Not only does my house smell good, but we are ALL getting the benefits of the oils. Essential oils are SO incredibly fast acting, penetrating our blood stream in record time and being able to inhale these oils for quick relief is such an amazing thing.
I am on the road to better mental and physical health, but I wanted to write this today to encourage ALL you woman out there, regardless of your age, that being Super Woman is not all that it is knocked up to be!! Pacing yourself, being forgiving and being good to yourself is key. Learning how to say YES to what is most important is something you need to learn early and being sure to take care of yourself is SO important because like I said – if you are not good – how can you possibly be good to anyone else?
Retire your Super Woman attire NOW and join me in living the Simple Life. Take time to smell the roses…. ♥
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 NLT
19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, 20 for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.
Tammy Trayer † ♥
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