Valentine’s Day is one of those holidays that I find people either LOVE it, HATE it or find it to be “Just Another Day”.
Everyone goes crazy to show their love for that special someone or for their family. Don’t get me wrong, it is a good day to celebrate the love you have for one another, but I feel that we should be doing this religiously every day! I believe the reason my whole family and I regard Valentine’s Day, in the same way, is because our Love Language is not really focused on Receiving Gifts! We are more geared to the need for Physical Touch, Words Of Affirmation, Quality Time or Acts of Service.
You are probably wondering what in the world I am talking about, right?!
Well, a good majority of our population goes through life without joy and experiencing a dried up love tank. They have no hope in their marriage and in the love that once was, not to mention the divorce rates are so high in our country. We have become disposable in ALL things!
Author Gary Chapman explains in great detail in his book The 5 Love Languages: The Secret To Love That Lasts how it is possible to recover even some of the worst marriages with simple easy steps and at the same time improving upon already wonderful marriages!
First and foremost, it is understanding the needs of our spouse and children for that matter and learning to serve them and help them to fully feel loved which in turn will fill their love tank to overflowing!
I highly recommend that you read The 5 Love Languages not only as a couple but as a family. Society today puts the wrong kind of emphasis on love and sex and rather our children have a jaded view, why not teach them how to fully understand what REAL love is?
The 5 Love Languages are:
- Physical Touch
- Words of Affirmation
- Quality Time
- Receiving Gifts
- Acts of Service
Everyone is very different and has a specific language that resonates with them or possibly multiple love languages. When the three of us used the simple online test to determine our love languages, we each actually have three languages that are almost equal in importance to us however the love languages are different for each of us a bit. Being that we have varying languages which totally makes sense for us now as we never get overly excited about the gift giving or receiving holidays because gifts are wonderful, but it is not what fills our love tank and gives us joy as does the simple pleasures of closeness.
I also LOVED how Gary pointed out that often times what happens is without knowing our spouses love language it is natural to serve our spouses the way we feel the need to be served ourselves and this is where the trouble and confusion come from.
For example, a husband who likes being served might do dishes for his wife or laundry and his wife’s love language is Receiving Gifts. Therefore, the husband is upset because he doesn’t understand why she is not happy with him and she is upset because she needs something different to fill her love tank. This right here may have just made a light bulb go on for you and once you understand what your spouse’s love language is you can simply adjust how you are serving them.
When both parties are receiving the love they require – they are happy, their love tank is full and they are much more inclined to serve and care for you. It also means that all the confusion, upset and misunderstandings go away! Make sense?
My friends, this post is intended to be my gift from me to you today for Valentine’s Day! May you enjoy reading this book The 5 Love Languages and creating a wonderful life and future filled with joy, contentment, happiness and lots of LOVE!
Love and Prayers,